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Off Topic: School Ignores Parents
Last night, I attended a meeting at my kids’ school with the intent of discussing the principal’s decision to go to school uniforms in the middle of the school year. The problem is that the principal didn’t want to hear our concerns. She tried to shut me up and I think you all know what happens when someone tries to shut me up. Not only that, but she scheduled this meeting on the same evening as the school board meeting, so parents had no opportunity for recourse. About 10 parents tried to make it to the meeting before it ended, but we were too late as the school board is located on the opposite side of the city from the school.
Here is the email I sent to the superintendent after the meeting last night. I’ve omitted names of people involved:
My name is CJ Grisham and I’m the very proud parent of three honor roll children (one of whom is an NJHS member) attending Williams Middle and Elementary School. On Thursday, 1 October 2009, Principal [name withheld] held a parents meeting to showcase the school uniforms. I’m sure by now you are aware of my disagreement with [the principal] after that “meeting.” On behalf of the “one or two parents” that also disagreed with the timing of this policy (which was really more like 50-60), I would like to schedule a meeting on this topic with you, the principal and parents. This is a topic that parents deserve to have a voice in. Since the principal refused to allow us to voice our concerns tonight, I’m taking them to the next level. If you refuse to meet with us, I will go even higher.
Huntsville City Schools policy number 102-8 states that “the Board of Education supports the development, implementation, and regular evaluation of a program in each school, which will involve parents and the community at all grade levels in a variety of roles.” The policy goes on to list some components of how that is made possible, such as:
* Family and school communications is two-way, regular, meaningful, and respectful of diversity
* Parents and the community are welcome in the school, and their active support and assistance are sought
* Inclusion of parents and community as partners in the decisions that affect children and familiesI will state unequivocally that there was NOT two-way communication on the uniform policy. It was a one-way communication that simply informed us of the decision to switch to uniforms mid-school year. The community was NOT welcome in the school as demonstrated by [the principal's] banishment of the media present to cover a simple event to showcase school uniforms. She did this rudely and without identifying herself WHILE a parent of one of the students was being interviewed. And, finally, parents certainly were NOT included in the uniform decision, which no one can argue doesn’t affect children and families.
Parents had an opportunity to question the security official and the uniform store official, but no one was allowed to question the principal who unilaterally decided this was a great idea. Let me state plainly and openly that I, along with most of the parents I’ve spoken and met with on this topic, am not opposed to school uniforms. Far from it! I have absolutely no problem with them. I wear a uniform on a daily basis as a Soldier. What I have a problem with are parents not being consulted on these major decisions. I have a problem with instituting an expensive uniform policy halfway through a school year after the most expensive holiday of the year and after school clothes have already been purchased. I have a problem with a principal who refuses to even listen to voices of opposition and then mislead you and others about how many of us there are! I have a problem with a principal who dismisses my concerns and tells me that she won’t discuss a uniform policy with me at a uniform meeting! I have a problem with a principal who doesn’t understand the fundamentals of our free society in allowing the media to cover a public event. What is there to hide if only “one or two” of us disagree, as you stated on record tonight? Her conduct tonight was unacceptable, mean spirited, and completely unprofessional.
One parent tried to explain to other parents how much these uniforms cost, but couldn’t be heard because no microphone was set up. When she went to approach the microphone after other parents wanted to hear what she said, Mrs. Williams said it “wasn’t necessary” and didn’t allow the parent to be heard. She mentioned some fictitious price sheet that I and other parents haven’t seen. One of the school officials sitting right next to Mrs. Williams cast aside our concerns over the cost of having to purchase multiple uniforms by basically telling us to teach our kids to do laundry! I thought we taught our kids how to conserve water and energy and yet we’re being told to wash uniforms basically every day if we can’t afford multiple sets?! No silly $50 voucher is going cover everything the kids need, especially with multiple kids. My cost would be easily over $400 to purchase just five sets of clothing and that’s assuming I even qualify for a voucher.
The parents and I would like to schedule a meeting with you to discuss our concerns. We are not against uniforms, we simply believe that there is no reason to force us to purchase them or the kids to wear them in January. We are in the middle of one of the worst recessions in recent memory and money is tight for everyone. The Huntsville City School system receives a LOT of federal money for all the military children attending school here. We deserve a voice in our children’s education. And we also vote in school board and superintendent elections.
I study law and am aware of numerous United States District Court rulings in which the legality of forcing unwilling children to wear a uniform were questioned and ruled unconstitutional when challenged. I brought two cases with me tonight. I’m also aware of federal law contained within the US Code that specifically states that “parents have the primary responsibility for the education of their children, and States, localities, and private institutions have the primary responsibility for supporting that parental role.” (U.S. Code, Title 20, Chapter 48, Subchapter I, Paragraph 3401(3))(emphasis mine)
We believe this decision can be postponed until the new school year or some other compromise. If the uniform is voluntary until December, it can be voluntary until May. Please let me know of a few dates when you would be available so I can coordinate with the families who are also concerned. A timely response to this concern is appreciated. Please feel free to contact me directly at [phone number deleted] if you would like to discuss scheduling over the phone.
May I also add that it was completely contemptuous of [7th grade science teacher] to remark to other parents how embarrassed my wife must feel being married to me. Those comments by her and other teachers about those of us that disagree are completely uncalled for and made me feel as if I needed to speak with the assistant principal to inform her that if there is any blowback against my kids for what happened tonight, lawsuits will follow. My children’s education experience had better not be affected by my actions in standing up for my rights as a parent and organizing others who feel the same way. I can’t even begin to describe how absolutely ashamed I am of the administration tonight at Williams Middle School. My wife is proud that I had the courage to stand up for what is right and stood by me the entire time. [That teacher] and other teachers need to stay in their lane of educating our children.
Sincerely,
CJ Grisham
(26) Readers Comments
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Robin
Good for you, CJ. Stand firm. I will voluntarily do a lot of things, but being “told” to do something gets my back up. I had to obey before I retired, but I’m a civilian now and I don’t back up well.
Respectfully, Robin
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Kate Kashman
You go, CJ. I am wholly in favor of uniforms, and wish my children had to wear them, but the behavior you describe (and as seen in the video) is really disturbing. I hope that the fight goes well!
Mothax
That is an outstanding letter CJ. States your concerns regarding the process without coming across as against the policy per se. Really well done sir.
Heidi Thiess
Wow, CJ, way to take a stand. BTW, is this Huntsville, TX? I was just up there for two days this week on other business.
Sudsy
Hey, these are the same clowns (the NEA anyway) who demand more funding for a failing program (Public Schools) in a manner that would be a scandal to the military…
They also constantly whine about how kids are failing and its the parents fault for not being involved. Interesting how you are a parent, and involved and getting blown off like this. I guess when they whine about parent involvement not being there, you don’t count when you take issue with them for their failure to communicate. Its sick how much teachers lack and professionalism and moral courage these days (in reference to the snide remarks you experience).
God help me when my kids hit school age…
I hear the home school option works well. In AK, thats what lots of folks have done, and it puts real pressure on our local district to justify a massive budget that goes up when the enrollment goes down (and they operate two Dept. of Education ‘drop out factories’).
Guard Wife
Mid-school year with no warning?
My girls go to Catholic school so uniforms are part of the deal. However, their uniform polos will require logos next school year. This has been announced and planned for over a year, if not two. I can’t imagine if, after spending all the money in August, I was now told to replace all their shirts with logo ones without warning.
And, that they won’t even discuss it? Ridiculous. It evidences their failure to handle this properly & their fervent hope that the fervor dies down and you go away.
Good luck.
CJ
Exactly! There was no mention of this until a couple of weeks ago and even still no discussion. Mid-year is wrong. Beginning next year would be fine and truly allow parents to plan and prepare.
Heidi Thiess
Whoops – nevermind, CJ. I just went back and checked your FB page and saw that you’re in AL. I know you’re coming home to TX soon, though, right?
Heidi Thiess
Dang. Did I just reveal personal location info I wasn’t supposed to? Geez, I’m out of practice commenting on blogs instead of FB. Just delete my earlier comment if that’s a problem. I’m rolling my eyes at myself.
CJ
No problem, Heidi. I’m coming to Texas next year, but currently live in Huntsville, AL, not Texas.
nan auston
I am a grandmother of 13 children, and I am glowing with pride that you fight so hard for your children.Although I live in Cullman, I am backing you all the way and praying for your family. More parents should stand up for what they believe is right. Don’t give in, don’t give up and never back down. Of course, being a soldier, you already know that! BTW, my husband is a retired navyman.
sue05
Keep at it CJ! It disgusts me how the parents who really care about their kids are completely ignored. I’m so glad my kids are no longer in school. My stress level has dropped a million percent. Good luck in your fight!!
Tish Hill
Well said CJ. I can’t wait to hear the outcome.
Isaac
In my country, every school has to wear uniforms, but not at the price the school in you city is selling them. The way the principal ignored the parents is disgusting as well. Keep it up CJ. I’m all for uniforms too, but the way the school is doing it sucks.
Dave Dooling
I lived in Huntsville for almost 30 years before moving to New Mexico and am stunned by this. Even if the teacher unfortunately feels that way towards the military, you *never* mock a person like that in such a forum. My dad was Navy and taught me “public praise; private criticism.” If the City school system is so awash in cash that it can afford a losing lawsuit, then it can afford to buy the uniforms.
SK
Outstanding, CJ! Your wife ashamed? Only a complete idiot would say such a thing. Your kids are very lucky to have you and Emily as parents, the kind of parents who stand up for them and for what’s right.
daniel
My son went to Williams when we first got to Huntsville. The Asst. Principle was a spineless liberal bafoon. Three black kids were constantly attacking my son in school, in the halls, in the bathrooms, in the lunch room, and in the class. But this ass wanted me to move MY son when he was not instigating any of the trouble. He would not move the other kids, or separate them. I went one day to talk to this man, and when I started into his butt, he did not even have the spine to aske me into his office. I told him to act or I would. THe next day, my son comes home again with bruises from these kids who pushed him around in the bathroom. I had to get the post commander (I was a civilian already, but the culprits were army kids) and HPD involved before he would do anything. By the way, my son is hispanic.
Huntsville School district has a history of buckling to the ACLU and ignoring parents. I had little choice but to sell a home I loved with good neighbors just to get away from that school district. And Huntsville wonders why so many do not live in it’s limits.
You want change, vote out the board and super, those are the ones who place the principles.
Carol Steward
Press on CJ………don’t let them mess with you and Emily!!
You have the right and duty to be concerned about your children’s school issues. That Principal should be fired because she is NOT doing her job properly!!
Miss Ladybug
Good letter, CJ. Keep up the good fight!
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Tanja
Good Job CJ
I am a parent, that was not able to make it to the so called “Fashion Show” because I had to work. I had a lot of questions, but as it turned out from the information I gathered from friends there was no communication at all.
I agreed with you completely on the school uniform issue…….until the last PTA meeting, the way we the parents and especially you and your family was treated was outrageous. Security and Police at a PTA meeting????????
I believe that our principal does not care what we think, it is her way or the highway, in her mind this is her school and she does whatever she wants. I cannot even support the implementation of a school uniform for the next school year anymore with a principal in place that does not care about establishing a good relationship between parents and school.
K Johns
I think it would be wise for you to contact all the parents who support your position and were at the meeting and get them to put in writing exactly what they witnessed at the meeting. If possible have them notarized and take them with you if you get your meeting with the superintendent. It would not hurt to also provide copies of the statements to your military superiors if you need to defend yourself over accusations made by the school principle, or anyone else. And don’t hesitate to retain a lawyer if your career or your ability to attend school meetings is threatened. Lawsuits and the threat of publicity is unfortunately all that some people will respond to in situations like this. Keep your head up and cover your back. Best of luck with everything.
Karen
The Huntsville City Schools should be ashamed. This information will go to BRAC transfers — active duty and retired military – and they will chose not to move to the Huntsville City Schools. The military community is very protective of their own. These stories are retold, and now the HSV will be known as dealing harshly with those who dare question the school district.
I have been silenced out of fear also. I know one room mom who was investigating massive mold in the classroom. The kids were taking secret cellphone pictures of the mold. When the classroom mom went to investigate, the principal called security and our kids were called liars.
Our congressman, Parker Griffith, should be protecting parents and children. He is too beholden to the AEA.
Dale Jackson, a talk show radio host, has taken this to a new level and alerted the community.
We are all living in fear of speaking out and protecting our children.
Tom
There is something freakish and evil about the natives of that part of our country. Moving was probably the best thing you could have done for your children.
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