A Soldier's Perspective
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Glamour Magazine Covers Military Dating Scams
I’ve been working with Glamour for a few months to help draw attention to women about the prolific scams using online dating sites. I’ve been writing about these scams, especially those using photos of troops, for about six years now. While my efforts have been highlighted on numerous television media stations, this is the first time that a media outlet directed specifically at women picked up on those efforts.
In its October 2012 issue featuring a beautiful Emma Watson on the cover, writer Liz Brody showcases how these scams work. With permission from some of my readers who have been scammed, I passed their information to Liz. This is a widespread operation that nets scammers literally millions of dollars per year from around the world. For the most part, English-speaking, industrialized nations like the United States, Canada, Great Britain, and Australia are targeted. However, gullible women in foreign countries are also targeted. I literally get emails and comments on this blog from countries as varied as South Africa, Colombia, Philippines, and France.
It is estimated that one in ten guys dating online is a fake and a fraud. Personally, I think that number is too low based on my experiences investigating these. Most sites don’t seem to be doing enough to catch frauds, but they appear to be working to fix it.
The FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center, IC3, tells Glamour that $4,000 an hour is lost to love scams, and experts agre the real number is much higher. “This is one of the most underreported crimes you’ll ever see,” says [Barb Sluppick, the founder of romancescams.org]. “People are so ashamed and hurt they don’t tell anyone, especially the FBI.” Last year Money-Gram alone (which, like Western Union, is used to wire funds) was able to prevent 4,879 romance-scam transactions totaling nearly $14 million from going through, thanks to a new detection system the company had set up. “Once we see the red flags – a transaction is within a certain dollar range, going to certain countries, or sent by a woman to a man with a different name, for example – we’ll get on the phone and tell her we have some concerns,” says Kim Garner, senior vice president of global security and investigations. “It’s a very emotional call.”
I focus largely on the military aspect of these scams. Over the past few years, I’ve seen these scammers use all kinds of photos removed from open Facebook pages, blogs, official military websites, and command pages. I’ve also seen my own photos and name used.
Datanta.com is a free online dating site with a global community. Two years ago, I got a Google news alert that my name had appeared on the site. Because there are unscrupulous, money-starved, washed-up, has-beens that like to libel me online I keep track of when and where my name is used. I keep meticulous screen captures of these instances for potential litigation.
I alerted the dating site immediately that my name and images were being used without my permission. As a happily married man, I don’t have a use for dating sites. I found my wife the old-fashioned way – chloroform and mind-altering drugs slipped into her drink. 
The funny thing about this particular profile is that practically none of the information was accurate. As you can see above, whomever created that profile aged me about five years and noted that I was a “Democrat.” That alone is cause for a lawsuit! Here’s the rest of my life I never knew about.
Glamour did a GREAT job of bringing attention to this issue. They were even able to contact someone in Nigeria who was one of the scammers. It’s a great read. If you or someone you know might be getting scammed, get yourself a copy of this issue to keep handy. Show it to them. There is a lot of good information that is very helpful. For example, if you’re not sure if you’re being scammed, ask yourself the following questions: Did he say ‘I love you’ within a few weeks? Does he often get interrupted when you ask something, giving him time to do a Google search for the answer? Does he make up things going on in his life that require financial assistance? Does he refuse to answer some specific questions by accusing you of having trust issues?
This site currently hosts names of hundreds of scammers. My posts on dating scams have garnered literally thousands of comments and is home to a budding community of support. If you think you’re being scammed, run the name through my site search. Check out my other posts on scammers by clicking this link. Above all, NEVER give any personal information to someone you’ve never met in person. Always meet in a public, populated area the first time. If you’re still not sure, email me.
(36) Readers Comments
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LL
My favorite part of YOUR particular profile will always be that they listed you at 5’11″. Bwaaaaaahahahahaha
cathy coe
Hi I read your article which was interesting and would like to highlight a site I am with and the number of people who have used military guys details to try and scam I have had a lot and at one time tried to report it , the site is Meetme perhaps you would like to check it out, its in insult to those who serve, I hope this sort of thing can be stamped out.
CJ
Cathy, go ahead and share the site here. I will approve the comment after reviewing it. Thanks for stopping by.
Gina
https://www.facebook.com/repetto.raymond/about
This person contacted me on the app called skout or flurv. This is a link to the Facebook page which I think is also a scam. He claimed he could not email me from his military address…red flag!
Jane
LL,
I just read this post and I’m curious about your comment on 9/16/2012? Is sarcasm the best post to leave and wondering what prompted your comment? Thanks.
CJ
What are you talking about? Sarcasm is always welcome.
LL
Jane, CJ is one of my best friends. I also know his wife very, very well and I recently spent Labor Day weekend with him and his family. CJ is about 5′ 6″ and I’m 5′ 8″ and I give him a hard time about being a midget. We (his closest friends) all do. I’m sorry my inside joke offended you, but I can assure you, it did not offend him. It amuses me to no end that they picked a “good” height for his fake profile and some tall woman like me would be very disappointed if they ever met him. Since I have done online dating and have towered over men who say they are 5′ 10″ (gotta love the LYING), I was a wee bit sarcastic. If you are unsure, you can check out my website (chromedcurses.com) and you can see a picture of myself, CJ, and our buddy Marcus all toting guns before a shootout/BBQ we had a few weeks ago. I hope this sets your mind at ease. It was not meant or directed at any of the unfortunate women who have been taken in by these liars, scammers, and buttheads.
Jane
LL, thank you for your response. My gut response wasn’t so much from being offended, but, why would someone respond in such a manner? Now I know why! I truly appreciate your response. I am thankful for all the people who have been “out” there trying to bring awareness to this problem. A few weeks ago, I had no idea that this type of crime even existed.
Michele King
I am a widow that has been scammed, if you Google majorwestlandrice@yahoo.com it will take you to the blog where I tell my sad tale scrolling and scrolling clear to the end. Those “rat bastards” are in my Facebook account and had been in everything else who knows they may erase what I am writing here again. I don’t care I just keep typing it all again. Well, anyway backto why I am commenting on this post which I had read about in one of the other rooms as a coming soon, but only now am able to read. Now, I am really PISSED. $4000.00 PER HOUR IS LOST! What the F…! That is 35 million dollars a year. When anyone who has been scammed gets to this site it is TOO LATE!! We need a new plan the old one is not working obviously. I don’t know anything about the army, but I have watched enough movies to know there is an oath that everyone takes to defend all of the United States citizens from our enemies. Sometimes enemies are not holding weapons that shoot. Surely, there must be a way to infiltrate these internet cafes. Why don’t you put Hilary Clinton on this subject? I am sure she would love to hang any man by there balls as these “rat bastards” surely deserve. I cannot believe that there is nothing to be done, I mean for Christ’s sake the military found Bin Laden!!! These “rat bastards” certainly can’t be clever enough to outfox the greatest country in the world. I know about someone dying in your arms as my husband did from cancer at the age of 44. It is traumatic and impossible to forget. When I think what we could do for cancer research or to make our soldiers lighter for combat or so many other things than giving all of that money to those “rat bastards” I could scream and fly right through this computer and strangle them myself. Thanks for having this blog to vent. I feel better, but saddened by the ridiculous predicament. Sincerely,( from a scammed widowed perspective) Michele King
Carrie
Hi Michele,
I could not find your blog. Could you please send it to me.
Thank you
Carrie
Sarah
I was found by scammers twice in the same day on skout. I was lucky enough to be suspicious enough to start researching myself and figured it out before losing any money. I think other than asking for money the biggest give away was language and grammar. A college educated man would never speak the way they typed. On of the two scammers was some one who was pretending to be a soldier. I myself found that soldier on Facebook and alerted him to the identity theft. My hope is that he was able to do something about it. The other was someone who claimed to be new to America from Germany. I hope more can be done in the future to stop this
Michele King
Whether he will get it or not I don’t know, but I put a message on Mark Zuckerburg’s facebook page. Why don’t you stick an encryption button for people’s photo’s and personal information. I look for the best in everyone and wouldn’t want to think you want all of those blue shadows to manipulate your subscriber numbers. Sincerely, Michele King. PS. That may not be the actual wording but is the gist as I don’t know how to copy and paste my actula words.
Michele King
actual, sorry I am not the best typist.
tina perez
i really need your email address. i am a victim of the military scam and yes he is threating me now if i dont give him money he is going to post my nude photos i sent to him…yes i am embarrased and ashamed that me, an intelligent not bad looking career woman got sacmmed!! but i am scared..
CJ
Tina, you can contact me at cj[at]soldiersperspective[dot]us. Don’t worry about his empty threats. This is what they do when they have been had. They are constantly threatening me for exposing them, but they live in an entirely different continent, unable to act on their veiled threats. It’s just a way to maintain power and hope that you are cowered into believing them.
rosemary stokes
I am upset to find I was communicating with somebody who had more than likely stolen the photos and i.d of a Stuart James US. military personnel, (after researching romance scam forums) when I confronted the perpetrator he turned very abusive and nasty, and made death threats to me. I was seriously taken in by him as it is not a phenomena we are familiar with here in Ireland. I was on facebook while recovering from a broken arm, and was not aware at the early stages of such abuses. I was asked to “friend” a soldier in afghanistan who wanted to marry me, sent me poetry etc. also a legitimate looking e-mail for jamesdavid@us.mil!+a link to the skype report where a soldier passed away while talking to his family. I really fell for the guy in the photo he was so handsome, and gorgeous in his formal uniform. I am a mature conservative older lady and took the contact in good faith initially. I am very upset by this encounter to put it mildly and knew it was a scam when asked to write to the un.for leave and a fee would be required! I am glad to have found this site, to help recover from the disappointment.I was on i.m from end of january to end of march 2013 with this guy. Thank you. Rosemary. 26/4/2013
James@luvessentials
That’s what’s annoying with the Internet and Social Media. Yes we get to share all our information but that is, in turn, for the public’s use. I feel unsafe now, even with facebook, knowing that someone can just copy your pictures and use it for identity fraud. Even if you put your profile in private, you still need to filter your friends! This is such a hard world for paranoids!
CJ
There is a way to ensure that none of your information can be shared, even amongst friends. You have to check your Facebook privacy settings and make them as strict as possible.
Jan
Wow. I thought this guy I was talking to was genuine. For two weeks I’ve been talking to him. But I did suspect from the start something wasn’t right. His English was not too good although he said he was from ny America when I asked if he was foreign and was quite upset. He says his name is John Henry smith and he lost his wife in car accident for years ago. Professed indulging love immediately and told me all the time I love you babyi miss you baby. I actually thought it quite funny. Came across him on a site called Badoo. Never asked for money but thought I’d put him off because hadn’t heard from him for two days. I kept asking what he did fir marines but said he was on contract to NNPC in Nigeria
Just heard from him today via yahoo email. He is not ok. Been attacked by rubbers and they cut off his drivers hand and took his money and cc and laptop. Lol. So I’m presuming his next step sill be to ask for money. I’m so glad I checked out your site. I was suspicious and decided to google “marines in Nigeria”. And your site came up through that.
I will see what his next move is. He has my email address but that’s all. Such a shame this is happening. His pictures are gorgeous. Font know where he got them. But he’s not in uniform. Just another sure to beware off Badoo.
Virginia Merrill
I was caught up in a scam using military personnel stationed in Afghanistan. I reconignized what was going on shortly into messaging with him. He went from asking money for air time, a birthday present for his son to wanting air fare to send his son home from Africa where he was traveling with a friend of his.I never sent him money, this went on from the first of July to the end of August. This guy was unbelievable. I reported him to Perfect Match,( where I picked him up), Federal Trade Commission, IC3, Attorney Generals Office in NH, and to Western Union. I was so upset by him actually using our Military, I went to the Army National Guard armory for help in locating the soldier who he was using. AS it turned out the scammer was actually using the soldiers real name, I tracked him down and let him know what was happening. The soldier told me this has been happening to him since 2006 and there was nothing he could do about it. I tried myself to get in touch with Perfect Match but to no avail, they don’t return phone calls and when you do call the numbers listed they are not in service anymore, big problem. Just today I have found the scammer has posted pictures of the soldier he was scaming on Facebook and actually still using his name, thats not a good thing. I have contacted the soldier to let him know. At least I know the soldier he scammed is home safe with his family. I have been extremely upset at them using our military for there scams, but the gall of them using there actual names.
JENNY
very bad and big shame to US military … tim wells big shit and he scammer .. using name of general david petraues to collect some amout for the victim of dating online ..please please check tim wells if is real soldier
soledad perez
Buenos dias, disculpen la molestia, solo lo hice por distraerme , jamas por conseguir nada,,,,no me interesa nada con alquien que no conozco, pero empece a no creer lo que me decia el señor, el cual no se si su nombre es verdader. paso a relatarle…se dice llamar general alex marcus, el y que esta el ejercito de los estados unidos adcrito en pakistan, en una comision antidrogas., lo que me llamo la atencion es que dice no tener, familia, ni esposa,ni hijos…ya empece a desconfiar de el…no me interesa para nada., jamas me han gustado los hombres mas jovenes que yo., si me dijo que podriamos conocernos cuando lo jubilen y no me parecio mala idea sin ningun compromiso…YA LE DIJE NOME GUTAN LOS HOMBRES MAS JOVENES QUE YO…cometi una discrecxcion le di mi direccion y telefono….me arrepiendto , se los comunico para ver si uds. me pueden ayudar a ver si esta mezclado en algo irregular…..NO ME GUSTARIA ME ENVIEN MENSAJE POR ESTA VIA, SERIA UNA VERGUENZA NACIONAL PARA MI. jamas me volvera a suceder….por medio de una miaga fue que empece a recibir solo mail….a sus ordenes. SOL
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Karen
I have been caught in a scam from ourtime.com. A user name of smile4daddy, who in turn is using the name Steven Collins from Gonzales Texas. The man sent pictures and shows him to be in the National Guard and stationed in Gaza. I would like to contact the real Steven Collins and make him aware of this scam. Lucky for me, within the first few days I suspected a scam and have not sent any money. I hate that our military men and women are being used this way and hope we can find a way to stop them
Westland
Michele King is lying about ever sending any money tell her to snap a copy of the receipt or the info she sent money to ?
Victoria
I am a widow. I got caught up in what I thought was a good, honest, American soldier in Iraq. Well after losing all my money, he still needed more. Finally said good bye. He was “Raymond Mark Johnson” so he said. His email was sgtraymondmark701@yahoo.com. Anyone else out there know him?? Have been talking with another solider. Never sent any money, can’t, don’t have any left. He has never asked me for any money, and has sent me money to cover my rent one month when my money was stolen. He says he is in Kuwait. Name of Steve Kellie, email: sgt_lobishsteev@yahoo.com. If anyone knows anything about him, I would so appreciate you letting me know. Thank you, and ladies, keep your guard up.
Lisa
Hi I came across this site trying to find all information about Military scammers and it is so bad want this world has come to I have so many scammer to many to count one said he was in the Army then started to ask me to help him get leave so he can come see me I knew this didnt make sence I know I am not that dumb I told him it is your job to ask for leave . I think I am working on another one now he showed his face on web cam for 2 mins and had to get off because he it not allowed to use web cam I have a feeling it was a recorded. He says he cant use a phone to call because of serurity reason I forgot say he said he is in Afghaniston in Kandahar. We talk on Yahoo messenger he has not ask for money yet just waitting My question is do the Military can they use web cam and phone when they want to. I want to learn and get these ass holes I try to go to the police with my first scammer but sence no money was exchange they can not do nothing Something has to be done and I want to help Right now want I am doing is trying to piss them off because they hate it I let them believe just a little that I am intersted and give them a run for there money I know one thing about these scammer they do get mad very easy if you ask to many question they try to make you feel quilty. and also how can you love someone right of the bat they always say I love you you dont trust me If their is a way I can help plz let me know I want to get these assholes
Lisa
Deb
I have almost been scammed by a man identifying himself as Sgt James Collins in afghanistan. V ery charming…Things were going well until he asked me to send his 8 year old daughter a laptop computer and I phone 5. Here is the address he wanted things sent to. Name: Andy James Country: Ghana City : Accra Zipcode : 00233 Address : P.O. Box Nt 814 new town
He is using ambless4040 yahoo or gmail.
Do not ever, ever send money or anything….Even if you are smitten–and he is charming. It is reprehensible that they are using our military as bait to single women.
Mildred
Need to find out if a Steve Edwards or a King Steve edwads is a fraud??
Germaine
I am trying to find out if the person that I am dating online is tring to scam me. We met on a site called SpeedDate his name is Moses H, Darby Capton of the US Army and I want to know if he is who he say he is. The stories on here sound like they are true but for me he is not asking me to send money he wants to send money to me so that I can send it to South Africa as donations. I am not sure as to what I am to do so thats why I am on this site trying to get some understanding as to what is going on and is there any truth to who or what type of person I am dealing with. Please responed back
CJ Grisham
ATTENTION EVERYONE!! I’m looking for someone that lives in or near California that is willing to tell their story of being scammed to the media. CBS has contacted me and would like to bring attention to these scams. If you are in California and are willing to tell your story of being scammed, please contact me at cj@soldiersperspective.us. If you’re not in California, but would like to share your story with the media so we can try to stop these people, please contact me as well. Right now, I only need those who were scammed living in the United States. I need someone as soon as possible!!
david hailes
hi cj if your ever loking for someone in scotland to tell there story get back to me im up for it so it might help others see what these people will ask for . thanks for all the good work you put in here and any help i can give you call me the more we put out there the things that are going on the more people might not feel so intimidated to come forward with there storys …. thanks davy
Nicholas
I am a gay male who responded to a profile on a gay dating site and began corresponding with someone claiming to be Staff Sargent Kyle Keenan, age 32, currently deployed with the Fifth Mountain Regiment of the US Army and stationed at Camp Eggers in Kabul, Afghanistan.
We’ve been corresponding for about six weeks now, and I’ve had growing suspicions as to whether he is who he says he is so I began doing a little online research, and that’s when I discovered this site amongst others and realized I was actually corresponding with a scammer posing as a US military personnel. I now know, in all certainty, that Staff Sargent Kyle Keenan is an impostor and indeed a scammer.
It’s relatively early in our correspondence and thus far he has not requested I send him any money or packages, but I’m sure those requests will soon be forthcoming as his messages seem to focus a lot on trying to build trust and get increasingly more amorous with each e-mail he sends. In my last e-mail I suggested we begin video-chatting on Skype (mostly because I had my suspicions about him and wanted to verify his identity) and in his response I received yesterday he wrote…”At the moment we are not allowed to use accessories here in camp since after the Bin Laden hazard, due to security reason, so i can’t possibly make calls or Skype.” I knew that was a crock, military personnel are free to video-chat on Skype all the time. In addition to all the bad grammar errors and numerous misspelled words in his e-mails this, for me, was my “Ah-ha!” moment so to speak. and the moment I realized ‘something is not right here.’
Thus far he doesn’t know I know he’s a scammer and that I’m on to him. I’m trying to figure out a way to nail his a$$ good, lol, sort of turn the tables and give him a taste of his own medicine so to speak! Would love to send him a computer virus but have no idea how to go about that. Maybe I should write and ask HIM to send ME money…or perhaps an IPad, lol!
At any rate, let my experience along with the similar experiences of others here be a warning to all. Dating sites, both straight AND gay, are FULL of these scammers so be forewarned and try to verify the identity of anyone you meet online as early as possible. Tip offs are poor English usage, numerous spelling errors and increasingly amorous e-mails. And whatever you do…don’t send them money or gifts!
Karan
My question is Tom Witt in the army real and in Syria at present?
Would like a answer if anyone can give .
Thank you
Karan
Anonn
@ Karan YES he is a scammer I found this info on him also the last Name he is using belonged to a Fallen Soldier his Mother dedicated a page to her Son on Facebook and every since then scammers have gone crazy using his Last Name mixed with other Names they have made up……….
First name: Tom
Last name: Witt
Aka: Sigmund Russell, Jerry, Carl
Age:
50
Location(s): Kabul (Afghanistan); Lagos (Nigeria)
Address(es): unknown
Phone number(s): unknown
E-mail address(es): tomwitt1960@yahoo.com
Operates on website(s): unknown
Scam media: unknown
Fake documents: unknown
Scam Report(s)
Report N1 (added on June, 28, 2012)
This man says he is in war in Afghanistan, a captain in the US Army. He is very loving but soon he wants you to send money. According to the police he is part of a criminal group in Nigeria. He contacts women in datingsites, facebook. I have pictures of him.
If he claims he is so real tell him to email you from his AKO it should end in .mil only ANYTHING beyond ,Mil is a scammer if he emails you email him back if it returns undeliverable and it will he is a scammer also ask him for his APO there is no reason he cannot give that out and ask him for his MOS do not acceot what he tells you and do not give out personal information nor send him anything Via wire transfer that is NOT the way the US Military works.
If he found you on ANY social site and claims to be Military he is a SCAMMER
Leave and retirement do not have to be paid for
Military members have access to their accounts at ALL times and will not need your assistance for ANYTHING
The US Military takes care of its own. hope this helps Anonn